The Changing of the Guard

The hubs has started working nights. I hate this. But he needs to do it and it's not a forever thing, its a for now thing. He's only had 3 shifts so far, but I cannot even tell you how difficult this has been on me. Which is weird because for the most part Alex pretty much sleeps all night. Except for last night, when it took him an hour and a half to fall back to sleep after his 3:30 feeding. Which means I went back to sleep around 5:00. This is all fine and well and good right now (ok, its not fine or good at all) but since I'm still home all day for the next few days, I can sacrifice a little bit of sleep in the wee small hours of the morning because it means that I can sleep until 11:00, like we did today. BUT in 2 days, when I go back to work, when Alex is still awake at 5:00, there will be no going back to sleep, I will just need to get up and get started with my day. I don't like this thought, since I have never been a morning person. Just ask any of my college roommates. Or my husband. Or my mom.

Anyway, once I go back to work, the hubs will be watching our little man. With my Mother in Law. At her house. So that he can sleep. Now, I understand that working the overnight shift wreaks havoc on your sleep schedule, because I did it too for like a year, and I never got used to it. Mostly because I didn't allow myself to sleep when things were going on. I do like that he'll be around to help my MIL out, and that he'll have some time to bond more with lil man. But here's what's unfair: all along when you're home with your little one, everyone says "sleep when they sleep" because of all the sleepless nights (or the hour and a half that it takes them to fall back to sleep after eating...). So, does that mean I get to nap at work? I wish. But no. So instead, I get to be sleep deprived in the middle of the night, and stressed that it feels like I'm doing this all by myself, except from about 4:30-8:00 every night.

Quick shout out to single mom's out there: I don't know how you do it. Seriously. Mad props to you all. Especially mad props to my mom who was a single mom for far too long and had to deal with a little one who wouldn't nap in the middle of the day so that she could sleep, because she worked the swing shift. What a brat that little girl was!

What was I talking about? Oh yeah. So, starting Friday, the hubs will come home and get our little guy and take him up to my MIL's house, and I will head to work. And cry. And at some point, I will come home and take over. I know it's early with this whole thing, but I need this to get easier. Right now.