hitting the wall

I started reading a new book last night called "Bedtiming." Its about using sleep training strategies at the right developmental time period so that its most effective and least frustrating.

Apparently 8-11 months is one of the worst times to try any sleep training strategies, due to the peak in separation anxiety. AWESOME.

Anyway, as with most parenting books, this book had stories from moms who had struggled with whatever issue, in this case, the lack of sleep. One of the stories was from a mom who had a 9 month old who, like the owlet, would not sleep through the night, despite her best efforts. She found herself growing increasingly snappy and frustrated and found herself beginning to resent her wonderful little baby. She realized one night as she was about to scream "just go to sleep!" that she had "hit the wall" as they say.

Friends, I could have written this exact. same. thing.

We had 3 amazing nights of waking up only once. Since then its been another major backslide. Waking up 4 times a night, sometimes being up for over an hour at each time. And the other night, I almost lost it. I almost yelled. I definitely cried. I squeezed my legs to stop myself from kicking the wall or screaming my head off.

Ii have become snarkier than usual, more sarcastic.

I have no short term memory left. I cannot remember people's names at my new job. Client's stories at my other job blend together, and I don't remember who I told what. My to do list sits unfinished everyday.

And, according to this "bedtiming" book, there is no relief in site, at least not for another 2 and a half months.

Umm. what?

There is only so much wine in the world.

Although, as the book says, "if you've made it this long, what's another couple months?"

And I guess they're right.

But in the meantime i apologize for the extra snark. I probably haven't had my glass of wine yet.